A Word on Being Thankful

I am hoping this does not end up turning into a rant, although now that I think about it, this subject does deserve a bit of fire behind it.

Lately I have been witnessing a lot of things and people being taken for granted. This has made me have to check myself to make sure I haven’t caught the bug as well!

In my experience, I can see that instructors teach because they love to. At my school alone I see instructors take time to teach extra (unpaid) classes for students who have a drive and desire to excel. I know at any time I can pull aside an instructor with a question and when the conversation is over have an answer to work with.

If you have an instructor or coach who takes the time to share their years of knowledge and experience with you, thank them for it and then put what they shared with you to work! If you try and fail, ask more questions and they will happily help. Want more attention in class? Knowing someone is trying to learn a technique you showed them magnetically draws an instructor back to a student without fail. 

Moving On:

“Do the best you can with what you have” – Nicholle Stoller”

The grass always seems to look greener elsewhere. I personally envy my California friends for having such a good close network for competitions and training. I wish I was able to make it out for all these special Ladies BJJ training camps that I’m always being invited to. I envy the ladies who get to train alongside their boyfriend or husbands.

The fact is, I haven’t spoken with anyone who has everything set perfectly to their own liking. The people I envy in California have their own set of issues that get in the way of what they view as their perfect training scenario – some of them even have said they wish they had my setup.

That’s when I decided that all we are required to do is our best. If for no other reason but the fact someone else considers your situation to be ideal, be thankful!

If you are the smallest person at your gym and have no one your size to spar with…

If you are the largest person at your gym and always have your technique written off as just being “bigger than everyone”…

If you are at a small gym with limited variety in schedule and training partners…

If you haven’t won a match in months…

If you have a handicap that puts you on the bench more often than you think is reasonable…

If you have other responsibilities and aren’t able to make it to more than one or two classes a week…

If you don’t have the finances to travel and compete as frequently as you want…

Just do your best! No one can look down on you if you maintain a thankful attitude and keep moving forward. If you have any more scenarios, please share them in the comments section below! 

Side note: I accomplished my 1,000 burpees in a week challenge and have a 46 minute complication video to prove it. I need to find a way to speed it up to about 10 minutes then I can share. My next challenge for this current week is to relearn a flying sidekick.

I Think I Have A Problem…

Hi.
My name is Nicholle.
I am addicted to Jiu Jitsu competition.

Now while you’re planning my intervention, let me tell you my tale…

My First Time

I didn’t want to try it. Honest! But all my team mates were doing it, and I just wanted to fit in and be accepted as part of the group. I just figured, what harm could one try do? So I put my money on the table, signed the “I will not sue you if I die” paper, stepped on the scale for the first time, then found a corner to shake and wait in.

Not gonna lie, the first time was terrifying.

With barely a smudge of sweat build up on my brand new, snow white belt, I got pitted against a blue belt twice my size. Somewhere in the middle of trying to support her in the air using just my foot in her hip, I thought to myself “This is crazy! What am I doing?” I remember my team mates yelling “Sweep! Sweep!” and myself thinking “What’s a sweep?”

When it was all over with, I was exhausted and thinking to myself how crazy the whole experience was.

Funny thing though. After it was done; I ended up winning a match, earning my first medal, going out to eat with my team mates for a victory dinner, and finding myself wanting to do it again. I wanted to learn what this magical “sweep” that I could have won the match with was – I wanted to do better!

Today

I look back on my first competition experience and am so glad I gave it a try! The friends I have made in the past three years competing have made the journey worthwhile just by themselves!

Other than all the awesome people I have met, I’ve gotten to visit some amazing places in my quest for expanding my competition horizons! I’ve competed from Los Angeles to New York, and even went to Portugal twice! I hope to make it out to Japan next year!

I’ve never thought of myself as a competitive person. I still don’t really. I just want to know how far I can go when I push myself. The beauty of it is that there will always be the “next!” factor at play. Win or lose, before I even leave the event space, I’m already thinking about my next goal.

The community I have become a part of fuels me. Any place in the world I go, I can find a mat to step on, and all language and cultural boundaries fall away and I am immediately among family.

My team is an awesome support group. We are a big crazy family and even coming from all different walks of life, we have a common cause of improving and learning every class. Police officers, convicts, lawyers, personal trainers, stay at home moms, chefs, doctors… We are all under one roof and coexisting! Bad days and breakdowns are forgiven and forgotten. It’s very freeing!

In Conclusion

I would like to request that you cancel plans for my intervention. I think some things are worth being addicted to.

Success!

If you read my last update, you will know that I had determined I was going to be competing in the feather weight division for the first time ever. I’ve attempted the cut several times before, but always quit halfway through. I was determined, and when I hit that wall again this time, I told myself “No quitting. Make it happen.”

I was about a pound over when I arrived at the hotel on Tuesday. I wasn’t horribly worried about it because I didn’t compete until Friday. Dad flew in from New Hampshire to cheer me on, and surprised me with a visit to Disneyland on Wednesday! It is hard to be on a weight cut at Disneyland, but it is also hard to really be sad about it because, hey, it’s DISNEYLAND! I bought some sweets to enjoy later!

Processed with VSCOcam with a4 presetI got to meet Captain America and he gave me some very good pre-competition advice. He told me to not be distracted by other people, focus on the task at hand, and also to remember why I started this in the first place – which is because it’s fun and I love it. Oss Captain!

I stopped in at the venue on Thursday to check my weight on their scale and found myself still a pound over. So for the rest of the day I simply nibbled granola and sipped small amounts of mineral water. By morning, I was a half pound under by my scale – not even wearing my lightest gi, and as you can see by the photo, I was VERY happy about it. This is probably the lightest I have been since before puberty!

Making this weight was one of the toughest things I have ever done. I really don’t know how to express in words how it felt! My official weigh in was 128.2 lbs; 13 lbs less than what I have previously weighed in as, and about 18 lbs lower than my average walk around weight.

After I weighed in, my coach admitted to me that he didn’t think I would mentally be able to do the cut. Hearing that made me smile!

Mike Calimbas is a master of capturing the moment! So many emotions on my face all at once here!

What About The Competition?

Right I suppose I should talk about the actual grappling portion of the competition! I had the luck of drawing my friend Taylor Biagi for my first match. We had both pegged one another as the person to beat in the division and it sucked that we had to meet up in an eliminatory match.

I lost the match, but it was awesome! I have no problem whatsoever admitting when I loose to a superior opponent, and Taylor is a most worthy adversary indeed! 

So Now What?

Since I felt so good making the weight, I have decided to focus on keeping my walking weight down between 130 and 132. Worlds is just 9 weeks away and I feel like I am reborn and rejuvenated! I’m gonna shoot for a little lower of a weight so that I can finally wear my awesome Raijin Fight Wear Gi in a competition!

And now, here are some fun photos from the trip!

With the Captain
With the awesome Taylor Biagi after competing!
Nick Albin aka “Chewey” – cant wait for him to visit my school again so we can roll!
Ketra, Nikki, Myself, and Tara. I always miss out on the group photos, so I insisted on this one!
Ran into Erin! She said it was a nice to make Gianni take a photo of her with someone for a change!
Ran into fellow Tennessean, Eric, also the creator of “JitsGrips”
I had a bit of a cheese and carb overload after competing… I’m still processing this meal I think!

Weight Cut and Video Update

I have been pretty busy (and fairly cranky with this weight cut) lately and haven’t taken the time to write. So I offer the gift of video logs of my training this past weekend!

With this cut I am having to do 30 minutes of cardio, twice a day. I elected to do the treadmill set on a max incline. It makes me angry and I only make it through by useage of my most excellent collection of motivational soundtracks.

Pan Ams are just about three weeks away! Aaaaahhhh!

Saturday Evening (14 Feb) with Katherine

Sunday Morning (15 Feb) with Ruth

Lisbon – The Underground

Brief summary of my experience at the Europeans:
I managed to lose my first round. I was up on the scoreboard and still do not understand how my opponent received pass and mount points when I had my xguard hook in deep enough to still lift her leg. Nothing I can do about it now though but move on to the next thing! The Atlanta Open is next Saturday!

Fooooood!!!:
After moping around in my hotel room, I decided to quit being a baby and get out into the city! I am staying in the Chiado area and wandered into a pastry shop for some goodies that were awesome enough to chase away the gloomies for a while!

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After this, I took the subway to meet up with a fellow Raijin Army member, Will. He doesn’t like being in photos so I shall refrain from putting up a photo and will instead share a picture of the meal I had during our hang out time at O Pote! I’m a very simple person. All it takes to keep me happy is good food and good company! I’m kind of like a hobbit in that regards!
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The Underground:
During my last trip two years ago, I took a cab from the airport to my hotel and missed out on the subway stations of the vermelha (red) line. I decided I shall have to pick a day to just ride the subway and stop at each station in order to take pictures. Each station is designed and decorated completely differently from the others! Here are some photos I took of the Olaias stop! The colors just are breathtaking!

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What’s Next?
I think I shall go to the zoo tomorrow! It’s on a subway line I haven’t visited yet so I think I shall ride there, and then walk back afterwards. It’s only 5k and will allow me to enjoy the sights above ground some – and I will likely stop at some random food place as well!
Sunday I want to visit the Aquarium, and then do some training next week. I am here until the 29th and plan to enjoy every minute of it!

The Night Before

I am currently sitting in my hotel room in Lisbon. I had a brief nap but woke up and am finding it difficult to go back to sleep. All those pre-competition thoughts and feelings are churning through my brain and body and, for the moment, I am having a difficult time relaxing.

Actually the main problem is that I left my heater running and now it’s just too bloody hot to get comfortable! So while I wait on the room to cool down, I thought I would post an update!

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So yea, I definitely feel my adrenaline is up higher than my normal “just above clinically dead” levels. I went to the venue and hung out for a few hours, watched my old white belt division, and checked my weight on the test scale. My weight was about .5 kg over which is no big deal at all and I’m already down to a comfortable number.

So I’m just sitting here sorting out my brain. I’m not nervous really; just more on edge and ready to go.

I’ve worked hard for this. Over Christmas while everyone else was out, I was walking to the gym in the freezing temperatures and doing circuits and solo drills all day – yes, even on Christmas!

I will be having my three year Jiu Jitsu training anniversary on the last day of this tournament. During those three years, I have completely structured my life around streamlining my training and competition schedule.

I quit a well paying job in order to go into business on my own, so that I would have the schedule flexibility to travel to compete. I live very minimally so that the majority of my income can go into my training. I haven’t had a car in almost two years now because I decided I could just bike and walk wherever I need to go.

The point is, I have come to realize that for me Jiu Jitsu is no longer a hobby. This is my lifestyle. Is it extreme? Yes. Do my parents worry? Of course!

Why do I do this? It started out just as a way to challenge myself and push my limits. It remains as such, and even more! I have gained so much through the process of the drive, that I want to inspire others to try it for themselves! The only way I know to do that is to keep pushing. The more I push, the more I can show to others the lessons I have learned these past three years of my life!

I’m definitely not saying that everyone has to take it to the extreme in order to benefit! In fact, my life was changed before I started the real push! I just want to see people try!

The room has cooled off a bit, so I close with this: these photos are both of myself.

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Training Partner Profiles – Categories

I’m starting a series of Training Partner Profiles where I’ll go over the types of training partners I run into at the gym, and how I work with them to achieve benefit for both of us! I’m going to start off explaining how I categorize everyone I roll with. These categories are fluid and I mentally move people around in them as I observe changes in behavior and training habits.

And yes, I know I am not the perfect training partner. If you ask 100 people who I have rolled with where they would classify me, I’m sure the results would put me into every category. It seems cold and calculating I suppose to assign people a category, but that’s how my brain works.

Category Definition:Moral-Question

Golden List: Ideal training partners!
I perk up when I see these special people in class. It could be the prospect of a good toe to toe battle, learning a new trick, or the smack talk during a roll; but they are the people I gravitate toward when partners are chosen.

White List: Good training partners for a good roll!
The majority of people are in this category. These are the people with whom I don’t feel any hesitation to bump fists with. The vast majority of my team mates are a part of this list.

Gray List: Okay to drill and roll with defensively.
The big thing that is involved here is usually the almighty Ego. They will roll nice until I start trying to attack and then they go into “hulk smash” mode (not in a good way!) – usually resulting in sprained fingers, bruised ribs, etc. This could also be a newer person who doesn’t know the proper way to move resulting in me having to pay close attention to keep both of us safe.
I can still have a good roll with them if I focus on defensive tactics only. I’m not at a size or skill level where I can help beat the ego out of them, so I will use this opportunity to practice my survival skills.

Black List: Do not roll with under any circumstances. Use caution with drilling.
This is usually a very short list and usually just a transitory placement. These are the people whom I feel will injure me beyond having a sore spot or a bruise the next morning. My first year of training I suffered many injuries that were due to rolling with people I should not have. It is very rare this is due to any maliciousness or ill intent! Most often I think it is due to a lack of experience and poor body control.

Over the next few posts, I will go over:

The Big New White Belt

Your Twin

The Spaz

The Upper Belt

The Lower Belt

The Judoka or Wrestler

The One Trick Kid

I will likely add more, this is just what I have in my head at this very moment!

The Patch Dilemma

I really don’t like patches on my gi. Maybe it’s because I like to fly under the radar and be invisible, but I just don’t like them. Growing up, I preferred to wear black, long sleeved Tshirts with no markings on them – and I still prefer darker less noticeable clothing.

However, there are a lot of people who have invested in me and in my training. I want people to know who has helped me with my achievements I have reached so far! So here are the patches I currently have on my competition Gis, along with why.

Team Patches

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Firstly, I always wear my coach’s patch on my back. My coach, Shawn Hammonds, has taught me since the first day I stepped on the mat and I fully intend to some day receive my black belt from him.
I have only have one TAC Team affiliation patch that I swiped from the office and I currently have it on the front of a white competition gi. I’ve moved it between a couple different gis and really need to get some more if I ever make it to Philly again!

 

Sponsor Patches

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I have been proud to represent and support Raijin Fight Wear since I was just a two stripe white belt! I was brand new then, and so were they. They seemed different than all the other start up companies in their designs, quality, and vision for the future and I wanted to be a part of their growth! Some days when I need a little extra push, knowing they are backing me up has been just what I needed! I always will be wearing their patch, rashguard, and/or super secret still-in-development Gi. “Respect All. Fear None.”

 

“Just Because” Patches

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All of the photographers I have had opportunity to meet during events are just amazing! I always try to support by buying photos whenever I can. I won a photo package offered by Mike Calimbas and I just decided I would keep his patches on my comp Gis because of his awesomeness!

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Girl-Jitsu has been an amazing supporter for ladies Jiu Jitsu and I really want to see them grow over the next few years!

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Scar Tissue MMA makes an appearance as well. They are a local company that has been growing and has been very supportive of my school as a whole, even helping out with fundraisers and designing a team gi for us.

New Perspective Yields New Results

I competed last weekend at the IBJJF Atlanta Open. This was my first time competing there as a blue belt, and it felt rather nostalgic as it was also my first IBJJF competition as a white belt. I told my coach that I had decided it was time for me to bring home my first double gold. I have brought home gold and bronze, but I felt like I was due for an upgrade.

It was a VERY long day! We met at the gym at 2:00 am in order to drive down. I didn’t sleep at all because I was having a terrible time with weight issues (female problems. Nuff said.) and was at the gym all night trying to drop the last two pounds. I jumped on the rowing machine, with multiple layers of sweats and hoodies, for two full episodes of “House”. Know how much I dropped? .6 pounds. What finally did the trick was a long hot shower just in time to jump in the car for the 5 hour drive to Atlanta.

Thankfully, I did get an hour long nap in the car. I arrived a pound under weight with about an hour and a half until my division start time. So I proceeded to sip some fluids and nibble on some trail mix.

I was actually working at this tournament as well. I became a bit of a floater since they were pretty short staffed. My first job before I competed was working as a ring coordinator. After competing, I bounced between score keeping, and crowd control in the bullpen.

Weight Division
There were only five girls in my division as a total, which I hate to see because it means that only one person in the division won’t make the podium or the open. What can you do though?

I had the extra match first thing. I don’t remember exactly how it went and I wasn’t able to get someone to film, so I guess I’ll never really know for sure. I remember playing de la riva and getting a sweep and winning on points. My opponent was very frustrated toward the end of the match. This match actually wore me out pretty well. My legs were tired and my forearms were sore – I was very happy to have a decent sized break while they snuck in another bracket before coming back to me!

My second match was the semi-finals. I thought to tomoe nagi but missed my foot placement and pulled guard instead. The ref pulled us back to center which I attempted to help with my doing “the worm”. I finished with a loop choke from half guard.

Third match was the finals. She pulled guard straight into a beautiful de la riva sweep which felt like had been drilled many times! She came up into my one legged x-guard which we played in for a few minutes. I finally managed to get my sweep and jumped to a guillotine, finishing in mount.

Open Weight Division
There were nine girls total in the open weight division, and guess who got the extra match again!? Yup! I was actually happy about that!

First match was not the type of win I like to see. We grip fought for a short time, and then she tried to snap me down. (I pause here to say thank you to Javier and Lance for helping me with takedown defense!) I ended up jumping guard and when she went down with me, her leg straightened and her knee made some awful noise. She didn’t say anything so I kept working and got a quick arm bar. Immediately we had to call the medic over because her knee was hurting badly. I watched the video playback later and it made me wince… I hope she’s okay!

Second match I dropped into a wrestling stance (odd for me!) and proceeded to defend a couple shot attempts. I tried to go for a guillotine off one, missed it, and ended up on my back. I then went after a loop choke and got the tap.

Third match was the semi-finals against another light weight. I got some weird takedown that I really don’t know what to call – some sort of combo maybe? I did get in a triangle for a second, but was able to get my arm pummeled under so I could attempt to pass. She turtled on the pass so I went to a 10 finger guillotine. She was tough and went to the bitter end!

Fourth match was the finals. And it was a war! I got the same weird takedown I had gotten in the previous match, this time ending in a cut through position. I got stuck in quarter guard and ended up getting my right knee twisted pretty badly. I had already been icing it for something that happened in one of my weight division matches, and that did not feel so good!
I managed to squeak in a pass for some points, but got caught in quarter again and couldn’t do much more than stabilize because of the knee screaming at me. I was able to finally switch which leg was trapped, then I got swept and the angle my left leg went over at made a few people scream and the medics stand up. That one didn’t hurt though (thank you hypermobility!) and I went to my one legged X-guard again and spent the last minute of the match trying to sweep back. I ended up winning the finals on those pass points.

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What Was Different?
A couple of days before I left for this competition I was talking with my coach and has a realization that I decided to put to the test in Atlanta.

This isn’t personal. This is not a fight between myself and my opponent. It’s a conversation between my Jiu Jitsu and their Jiu Jitsu. If I make it personal, I become ridged and on edge. If I am relaxed and fluid, I can respond without hesitation to what my opponent offers me.

Before my finals match in the open, I was sitting in a chair outside the bullpen having a conversation with myself. This was the first time I had ever been in this position. I had never made it to the finals in the open division before. I realized I could easily stress out over it, but I decided to just go with it. I chose to trust that my training will have an answer for what was ahead, and all I had to do was take what my opponent gave me, give back what I have, and see what happens.

So in a nutshell: I finally learned to chill out. I’ve been focusing this past year on my mental game, and keeping my stress levels low. I think I finally “got it”!

In Closing
I just had so much fun at this competition! I got to show off my new gi from my awesome crew at Raijin Fight Wear, made new friends, worked hard, got my first double gold, and even got a congratulations from the head of our new team!

Next up: No Gi Pan Ams and No Gi Worlds (followed by Disneyland!)

 

 

A Perspective Changing Photo

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I just got done competing in my first open belt cash prize tournament. I had two wonderful photographer friends of mine come to take pictures and this is one of the first ones that has been edited so far. It kind of rocked my world.

It has always bothered me to some degree that I am not one of the cute, small, dainty looking girls. Sure, the majority of my psyche tells me that women come in different shapes and I shouldn’t let it bother me that I can’t fit my self into a particular mode… But I do have my moments when I mentally do just that.

When I saw this photo my first reaction was that I was going to just shove it away and pretend it didn’t exist. It definitely doesn’t fit into the mental model of what I should be.

Then I stopped myself.

I looked again.

It’s definitely NOT dainty.

But there is something else there. Something more important.

Actually there are two things. Both of which, I can thank the past two years of Jiu Jitsu training for.

1. Confidence
Seriously! I look at that picture and I see someone ready to take on whatever is thrown at her! Before Jiu Jitsu, I had trouble making eye contact and would get horrible anxiety when I had to be in crowds. Growing up, I always wished I could be this kind of confident!

2. Strength
Nothing little and dainty here! I look strong and fairly on the buff side.

This picture seriously brought me to tears. I’m an athlete, and I have a purpose. I realized “small, cute, and dainty” is not me, and that’s totally cool! My daily training has grown me into something different, and I kinda like it! Thank you so much to Janet Wohler for taking this photo!

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That little tidbit aside, I had a good time at the tournament and won the cash prizes for Gi and No Gi. It is enough to pay for my plane ticket to Portugal in January for the European Championships! Yay!

My sponsors Raijin Fight Wear sent me a prototype of their Gi to test out for them, and it was a huge hit! Can’t wait for it to officially launch and for everyone to see the awesome detailing on it! I have to keep that under wraps for the time being, but it is worth the wait!

The Atlanta Open will be in a few weeks. I’m registering tomorrow, but there is no one in my division and they are at 70% capacity already. Plenty of feather weights, but no light weight love. I’m gonna hope someone is just waiting to see another name on the list!

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