I rolled a bit at the 11:30 class and one of my teachers came over and chastised me for just sitting back and being complacent in someone’s guard. I tried to use the rib excuse and he “pished” at me and told me I was fine. So within 10 seconds I got out of mount, took back, and then very shortly had the tap.

I admit I was a bit irritated at first. But when I got home I started thinking about it. It has been 5 weeks – and I should be healed enough at this point that it can take a good roll.

So honestly, I think I’m just scared to push myself again. I need to push through this – even if it terrifies me. If I don’t, I’ll just be a hum drum Jiu Jitsu practicer.

So, I decided that I would join my first 5pm sparring class since I got broken. This is coach’s toughest class – non-stop rolling. If we are too slow changing partners, it’s pushups on his count while screaming “I’m a champion!”

I did all right in a few rolls, and got smashed in a few rolls. Got yelled at by coach for not tapping to a kimura when I should have. Tapped a few times to kob on that right side (just to be safe).

All in all, did all right – and feel pretty good about it. I’m a little sore on that right side, but it’s a muscle kind of sore. It’s probably weak from being babied for over a month.

I went out and ate like a starving vagrant, then came back for class at 7:15. I was pretty gassed still – didn’t have much left in me physically. But I have to push myself to prove to my brain that I still can.

Anyhow, on a slightly different note: coach informed me that we’re gonna have to work on my half guard technique because it “sucks”. I was also chastised for not using my spider guard. “Whom the coach loveth he chasteneth.” – was feeling the love tonight!

So lots to work on! Gotta retrain my brain and body at the same time. Good thing I like a challenge!